


Keep Calm and Lie On

by Trista_zevkia



Category: Lie to Me - Fandom, Sherlock Holmes (BBC)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-16
Updated: 2011-06-16
Packaged: 2017-10-27 10:53:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/295027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trista_zevkia/pseuds/Trista_zevkia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A conversation</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep Calm and Lie On

This case was going to drive him insane! He’d handled a few similar cases in the past, but never with six suspects ready to alibi each other. The usual ploy of separating them and convincing them that the others were talking hadn’t worked. Even paperwork was starting to look like a good distraction, but first he’d check his email. Sorting out the useful from the junk from the interoffice politics could be kind of soothing in its own way, but two emails made him wince. It wasn’t the subject line about the case he was avoiding, so much as the senders names he wasn’t happy to see.

“Bite the bullet and get it over with.” He muttered to himself, before opening the first one.

**If you can’t see they’re lying, you’ve wasted your time at my seminars.**

A flood of anger made it hard to open the next email, as his fingers had become stiff claws.

_Lying liars, Lestrade._

Shoving back from his desk, Lestrade yelled at the screen. “Well no shit, Sherlock!”

Storming out, Lestrade yelled at the whole building. “I’m going to the firing range!”

Four full clips later, a much calmer Lestrade sat back at his computer. He knew what he had to do, even if he didn’t like it. Opening a new email, a brief and formal request for ‘actionable intelligence’ was sent to both parties. That taken care of, Lestrade went back to sorting through the rest of it. It wasn’t five minutes later that he had two new emails to deal with.

 _Donald Gregson is your killer._ Both messages held the simple reply, as if they wanted to state their suspect before the other guy Lestrade sent the message to could. Lestrade couldn’t help but roll his eyes as he emailed them back.

_I need proof, a reason to single him out._

**Three of your suspects showed surprise when told your theory of the crime, they alibi the two who showed fear. They are all scared of Donald.**

_What drug are you on C_Light? That’s not evidence! Donald has orange dust on the inside of his left pants leg. This could only have come from him dragging his injured leg while walking around the mining site._ This reply wasn’t directed at him, but Lestrade read the courtesy copy anyway and made a note to check the man’s pants.

 **I study people, Consult_Detect, not crime scenes. Donald only showed contempt during the interrogation. He’s not even threatened enough by the cops to get angry, though he pretended to a few times.** Lestrade was more than willing to let these two talk each other to death, so it took him a moment to realize something, allowing another email to come through.

_I noticed how relaxed he was, yawning as they took his DNA and prints. Slouched in the chair, hardly moving. But Craig Knopfler and Seth Boyle were calm, until Donald was mentioned._

_How did the two of you see the interrogation?!_ That question seemed to take some of the wind out of their sails, as there was a few minutes before they replied. Or maybe the question just reminded them that Lestrade was reading the rapid fire emails. _Never mind, I’ll tell the techs to find where the camera feed is going that it shouldn’t. But since you’ve already seen it, give me proof or get arrested!!!_

_C_Light, you should see the view from his webcam. Lips narrowing, eyebrows getting closer together._

**That’s anger. He’s pissed b/c he doesn’t know how to work his webcam. Do you have a link?**

_Sending now, in a separate email. Also has a new link for that site that made us email the Inspector._ That statement was proof enough for Lestrade that Sherlock had hacked his webcam and interrogation room, but not enough to prosecute.

 **Ta, mate! I’ll save that, and watch for updates.** Though maybe if the two of them used the same site, they’d be easier to catch doing something illegal. The two of them?

_I’ve got you too. Woo! Did you see what his face just did?_

**That was surprise, Consult_Detect, as he realized something. But the look now is his response to the realization. See the eyebrows, raised and pulled together? Lips pulling back to the ears?**

_He’s even got the eyelids involved, top raised and bottom tensed. That’s fear, right?_

**Paralyzing fear, though I don’t know why he should have that just b/c I’ve got your email address. I don’t even know your real name!**

_Watson keeps telling me I have no manners. I’m Sherlock Holmes, the world’s only consulting detective. You’re Dr. Cal Lightman, microexpression expert._

**Nice to meet you. I’ll look you up next time I get to London.**

_No you will not! I’m putting you on the terrorist watch list, Lightman. Hell, I’ll put both of you on that list before I let you meet in my city, I don’t even want the think about the chaos and mess that you two would leave behind you! I can even make the terrorist thing stick if I can prove Sherlock hacked into the interrogation room feed._

_Lestrade, you can’t make it stick. Night, Dr. Lightman._

**You have a good lunch, Sherlock. Lestrade** And with that, the emails seemed to stop.

Feeling sick to his stomach, Lestrade took the rest of the day as a sick day. He’d just introduced the two most annoyingly brilliant men on the planet to each other! In his gut, Lestrade knew he’d get a taste of the special circle of hell they were reserving for him when those two finally met. Tomorrow, he’d fill out the paperwork for the terrorist watch list, or find a way to kill Sherlock, whichever was easier.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Cool, Cruel Bullies](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2711264) by [Im_The_Doctor (Bofur1)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bofur1/pseuds/Im_The_Doctor)




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